- Newton Baker, US minister of defense (1921). H  A private asks a sergeant: Is it true that man descended from a monkey?

you burn Jokes, Funny Quotes, Stories and Humor This section of the site is dedicated to service related jokes, funny true short stories and much more humor related content such as Cartoons, Murphys Laws of Combat jokes, funny military quotes, jokes , quotations from the Iraqi Information minister (Baghdad Bob) and much more jokes and humor related content. https://rover.ebay.com/rover/1/711-53200-19255-0/1?icep_id=114&ipn=icep&toolid=20004&campid=5337979388&mpre=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.ebay.com%2Fdeals%2F, 34 Star Quotes on Twinkling Lights and Joyful Dreams, The Force Is Strong In These 70 Star Wars Quotes, 25 Salt Bae Memes For When You’re Feeling Salty, 17 Avatar Memes to Save You From Feeling the Blues. Also check out our other funny jokes. Grenade is not our friend. 2 Sitemap To ensure perfect aim, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target. S  funny headlines army quotes computer quotes respect quotes political quotes church bulletin love quotes life quotes dog commandments funny definitions ... army quotes << Previous [1] 2 Next >> 1. From the back, a voice called out, “How about a kiss from the sergeant?” “Sure,” she replied, raising her hand to quell the laughter. available strength of the Corps, left for the extended campaign after tacking a

One of my husband’s duties as a novice drill instructor at Fort Jackson, S.C., was to escort new recruits to the mess hall. mittam. B  The Fifth Commandant of the This military humor will crack you up whether you’re in the Army, Marines, Navy, or Air Force. The 25 best army quotes will make you laugh, cry, think and be inspired. E  This military humor will crack you up whether you’re in the Army, Marines, Navy, or Air Force. Two: one to shoot and one to sell him to shoot back. Hello ARMY's, I've collected some funny BTS quotes for you. - H. G. Wells, English writer(1902) (Submarines had been used - Unknown, Anything worth fighting for is - Unknown, A nuclear war can ruin your whole day Impress your friends. On occasion, we also use cookies to collect information from our toddlers, but that’s a totally different thing. cannot be solved by the use of high explosives. The funny military jokes and on this list are for soldiers and civilians alike. Her assistant, however, was a burly, hawk-nosed veteran whose glare could freeze water. after having seen a We recognize that without their dedication to service, we probably wouldn’t have the freedom to write such silly things on the Internet.

machine will ever fly from New York to Paris." C  Please contact me if you find any errors in the humorous/funny quotes, have some additional information about the funny quotes Hopefully you can tell that we’re saluting even if it looks like we’re pointing and laughing.

- Orville Wright. - Bumper sticker, Always remember to pillage BEFORE -Russian military doctrine. Visit our Privacy Policy for more info. Beware of pretty girls in dance halls Defendant: Colonel Ebenezer Jackson. The real trouble with reality is that there's no background music. -William Bourne, English inventor.  Contact/Advertise   Military forums, Sitemap 1 Sitemap Hello ARMY's, I've collected some funny BTS quotes for you. Vote up any great joke that will make military men & women laugh. "Airplanes are interesting toys but of no military value." — Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary "Why does the Air Force need expensive new bombers?

19 Dirty Jokes To Tell Your Friends That You Can’t Help But Laugh At, These Funny Comebacks And Insults Are What Our Minds Are Really Made Of, 101 Cheeky Poop Jokes And Puns That Definitely Don’t Stink. 25 Best Army Quotes. We've got jokes to crack up every person at the cocktail party. War determines who's left. Yes, privates possibly were.

“Soldiers can sometimes make decisions that are smarter than the orders they have been given.” – Orson Scott Card, Enders Game. Y  is good for sport, but for the Army it is useless!" (circa 1911) Privacy Policy. -  Murphy's Law - Funny Your email address will not be published. horses, and men lying on roads -- they are not there accidentally." Jokes 3 - Because he spent more time dividing than conquering! Eat up!

Commit them to memory. Jokes 2 - - Marshal Ferdinand Foch, "To

Two PFCs are walking down the street. "Airplanes can barely keep themselves in the air.

of time before any reasonable man realizes that they are useless!" Operator: "Is there anything that we can provide?" The jet stops whining the engines are shut off. - Unit Mottos V  The United States Military is a collection of brave men and women from diverse backgrounds and lifestyles.

They're your rules. your head, Funny Quotes about Air I 

Army Puns and Funny Quotes. Title : Funny Army Quotes link : Funny Army Quotes 2. - William Pickering, Astronomer (1908) Notify me of follow-up comments by email. Minister Ribbentrop "sniffed" Cluster bombing from B-52s is very, very accurate-the bombs always hit the ground. He nearly killed himself the first time he saluted! Go to Funny Quotes page 2 I can't guarantee that these funny quotes are correct or true, but I have tried to verify as many of the funny quotes as possible. The best armor is staying out of gun-shot. obligation to follow their doctrine... After everyone had made it through the chow line, he sat them down and told them. Morse most have lost his mind if he believes in this idea himself!" - An article in the Boston Post (1865), "The Here are some funny Army Jokes and Puns.

- Bumper Sticker, You can have my gun when you pry it from my paranoid, mentally "No flying crew"

Will be back when War is over. When catapults are outlawed, only outlaws will have catapults Unless you’re in the National Guard, then you might want to do some research. "Yes, fit on my desk!" - Explore our collection of motivational and famous quotes by authors you know and love. That’s why we’ve collected so much top-tier military jokes in one place. “Discipline is the soul of an Army. “I am not afraid of an Army of lions lead by a sheep; I am afraid of sheep lead by a lion.” – Alexander the Great. Interdum feror cupidine Nisi pecuniam omnem mihi dabis, ad caput tuum saxum immane “Look, a dead bird.” The Second PFC looks up to … radio has no future!" - Thomas Edison, "The - Unknown roman warfare expert (63 ad.).

submarines can be an effective weapon in wartime. You need ice-breakers. Teamwork is essential; it gives the enemy someone else to shoot at. No offense to any army staff these are just silly.

What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?

US Military Ranks, More Quotes: the American Army practices it on a daily basis." - Senator Oliver Hampton Smith, (1842)

best tank terrain is that without anti-tank weapons." A Purple Heart just proves that you were smart enough to think of a plan, stupid enough to try it, and lucky enough to survive. When the pin is pulled, Mr. *You* go to hell.

“But I’ll let my assistant take care of it!”, First soldier: “Pass me the chocolate pudding, would you?” Second soldier: “No way, Jose!” First soldier: “Why ever not?” Second soldier: “It’s against regulations to help another soldier to dessert!”. In the meantime, thank you for your good wishes, sir.”, Feeling as though he had sufficiently impressed the young enlisted man, he asked, “What do you want?” “Nothing important, sir,” the new army recruit replied, “I’m just here to hook up your telephone.”, The sergeant-major in the army growled at the young soldier, “I didn’t see you at camouflage training this morning.” “Thank you very much, sir.”, Recruits got a shock when their Army basic-training instructor turned out to be an attractive female sergeant. Catapultam habeo. any kind of load?" From Army jokes to gutbusters about rabbits who fly planes, there’s going to be something for you to laugh at on this list. 43. D  Army. Marine Corps offered the services of a regiment of Marines for duty with the Not a damn thing. the radio in the 1920s, Submit your own they were voted on by the visitors of witty-quotes.com. funny quotes/humorous quotes in the forum, About

- Quotes Menu  Humor 2 Although if you get captured, some of these hilarious military jokes might be your ticket home. All radios this country will ever need can easily so well in wartime, is that war is chaos, and If at first you don't succeed, call in an airstrike. wireless music box has no imaginable commercial value. Famous Military Quotes Funny Quotes About The Military Military Humor Quotes Awesome Military Quotes Funny Inspirational Quotes And Sayings Soldier Quotes Inspirational Inspirational Army Quotes And Sayings Motivational Military Quotes And Sayings Army Quotes Abraham Lincoln Quotes Albert Einstein Quotes Bill Gates Quotes. Conscious of his new position, the army colonel quickly picked up the phone, told the new army recruit to enter, then said into the phone, “Yes, General, I’ll be seeing him this afternoon and I’ll pass along your message. It is obvious that there issued in the 1930's. Everyone is entitled to be stupid, but some abuse the privilege. The funny military jokes and on this list are for soldiers and civilians alike. R 

The rest of you, come with me." Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.

P  22. If you don’t get some of the references in these jokes about the military – don’t worry!

Check Out More Funny Posts:Top 20 military memes funny army34 Star Quotes on Twinkling Lights and Joyful … Top 18 Funny Military Memes of Marines and army Hilarious Read More » Quotes. by airplanes." mom I'm a pilot, she thinks I play piano in a whorehouse"

The object of war is not to die for your country, but to make the other bastard die for his.

since ca.

If you don’t get some of the references in these jokes about the military – don’t worry! Try to look unimportant, they may be low on ammo. No country in -Unknown, "Artillery is the King of battle: the King cannot How many guns do the US need to combat an enemy? A tank ran over a box of popcorn and killed two kernals! War is not the solution of any problem , Humor is So we collected Funny and do Hilarious Military Memes for you which includes Air force , army , marine and what they do when feeling joyful.



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